I started to really miss being on holiday about 4 days in to my holiday. Bare with me, I’ll explain.
It took me at least 2 days to settle in to our location and shake the holiday anxiety (still working on that piece). Day 3 I started to relax and enjoy it, I also stopped feeling guilty about letting/encouraging Grandparents and an Aunt to take on a fair amount of my parenting (thank you by the way x). So by day 4 I realised I would have to go home again..in 3 days no less. That’s when my brain really decided to betray me (for the purposes of the rest of this article my brain is represented as a completely separate entity).
Here’s a little list of some (by no means all) of the thoughts I had while on holiday. I hope the house is OK -I’m sure we’ve all had this thought but seriously WTF brain. Unless it’s somehow burnt to the ground or been burgled the house (inanimate object) is ok. I didn’t leave any teenagers in it, I don’t have a cat and my Mother lives around the corner, and said she would pop in and mow the lawn (thanks Mum).
The House is actually probably in better shape than it would be if we were in it. I have sooooo much washing to do -related ideas Maybe I can reduce the amount of Clothes everyone is wearing, ie. extended PJ time Is there a washing machine here (I actually considered doing washing on holiday!)
Do I have enough carrier bags for the dirty stuff so it doesn’t scruff up the clean stuff? (note. There was no clean stuff).
I don’t want to go back to work. – Again this is one for all. For me this always goes back to feeling like I have too many things sitting in my brain, and being on holiday allowed me to let one thing go. It’s worth mentioning that my job is beyond cushdy really. I like my Boss, get paid reasonably well and have an element of flexitime. It’s just that now I have a kid i miss him and I feel bad that I don’t get to enjoy him. He’s not at School yet and I wish I was there to do all the fun preschool stuff without being grumpy because i’m fried from work.
I forgot to write my anxiety piece for my blog. -Seriously brain….SERIOUSLY! Its my blog, I have no deadlines, barely any followers and I am purely writing it for me and you add this to the list of worries. F*#$ you brain.
Anyway I’m home now and honestly it’s taken me until today to settle back in. One of my friends text me to ask if I had a good holiday and my first thought was “Oh I have friends that I have to stay on top of too”. I had become so focused on work and to do lists that I totally forgot that these things are such a small part of my life. My life is so much bigger and full of family and friends and I am so lucky. Moral of the story? Relax when you’re on holiday, relax when you’re at home, just relax.